All Things Cynthia Medina

27 Aug 2010

How men screw up the romantic moments

Women all over the world, can you relate?

2 Aug 2010

50 Things you don't want to hear during surgery

1. "So Bob, did you hear the news this morning?" "Yeah, something about the sale prices on fresh organs going up..."

2. (doctor singing) The left vein's connected to the...right aorta...the left brain's connected to the..stomach bone...

3. A screwdriver?... This can't be right.

4. Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness.

5. After everything we did, I can't believe this guy is still alive.

6. Ah well, you win some, you lose some...

7. Alright everyone, let's dig in.

8. Alright, this is our first operation, we should set up some kinda system. Hmmm...I'm thinking we have a sort of good cop, bad cop thing going on..

9. Hey! Give that back! There's no law against drinking in the operating room...

10. An instruction manual would have been nice.

11. And now presenting: "Trading Spaces: Hospital edition!"

12. And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape.

13. Anyone see where I left that scalpel?

14. At least he doesn't have brain damage... Wait... Now he does.

15. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

16. Bo! Bo! Comeback with that! Bad Dog!

17. Check it out! Isn't this 100 times cooler than using juggling balls?

18. Check the fridge... Nope, just beer.

19. Could you stop that thing from beating

20. Death is probable... Now it's certain.

21. Do you see that bag?... You don't want to go in there.

22. Doctor Hannibal Lecter, please come to the operating room, Doctor Hannibal Lecter...

23. Doesn't this remind you of that scene from Family Guy?

24. Doesn't this remind you of the time we played that game of Operation?

25. Doesn't this remind you of the time we played that game of Twister?

26. Don't worry it landed on heads, you're gonna be fine.

27. Don't worry, ain't nothin' a little duct tape won't cure...

28. Don't worry, I'll remember how to do it...OK...think back to that episode of ER...

29. Don't worry, you won't feel a thing. HAHAHA...I really get a kick outta saying that...

30. Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

31. Down...set...hut!

32. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

33. FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

34. Forget about her heart... What she really needs is a boob job.

35. God performs miracles... I don't.

36. Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie.

37. Has anyone here used one of these before?

38. He looked better when he came in.

39. Heehee - I could act out Hamlet with this thing...

40. Heehee - that was a good one. Here try this...just give his brain a poke...riiight...there...

41. Hey Beavis...heh heh...check it out...BOING OING OING!!!!

42. Hi, I'm Bill, one of the OR techs, are you the new surgeon?

43. Hot potato, hot potato...

44. I don't CARE if you've never been to med school...

45. I don't understand!?!? This didn't happen in the video.

46. I had a bad feeling about this case, but that tarot card reader made me feel much better.

47. I see dead people.

48. I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.

49. I'm kind of excited, the last time I performed one of these I was a resident.

50. I'm gonna need one of you guys to start whispering in her ear. Tell her to "Move away from the light".

20 Jul 2010

Things that only happen in R.D (humor)

11 Jul 2010

The Dominican Funeral (joke)

An old couple in Santo Domingo was puzzled when the coffin of their dead relative arrived from the USA. The corpse was so tightly squeezed inside the coffin that her face was practically touching the glass cover. When they opened the coffin, they found a letter pinned to her chest, which read:

Dearest Papi & Mami:

I am sending you Tia Juana's remains for the funeral in the Santo Domingo Cemetery.

Sorry I couldn't come along as the expenses were too high. You will find inside the coffin, under Tia's body, 12 cans of Bumble Bee Tuna, 12 bottles of Paul Mitchell Shampoo and 12 bottles Paul Mitchell Conditioner, 12 Vaseline Intensive Care Skin Lotion, 12 Colgate Toothpaste and 12 cans of
Spam. Just divide it among the family.

On Tia's feet is a brand-new pair of Reeboks (size 8) for Joseito. There are four pairs of Reeboks under her head for Antonio's sons. Tia is wearing six Ralph Lauren T-shirts - one is for Roberto and the rest are for his sons.

Tia is also wearing one dozen Wonder Bras (my favorite), just divide it among the ladies. The 2 dozen Victoria's Secret panties that she is wearing should be distributed among my nieces and cousins. Tia is also wearing eight Docker pants, please keep one for yourself and the rest are
for the boys.

The Swiss watch you asked for is on Tia Juana's left wrist and she is also wearing what you asked for Mami (earrings, ring and necklace) just please get them before anyone arrives to view the body. Also, the six pairs of Chanel stockings that she is wearing must be divided among the teen-age girls there. I hope the colors are to their liking.

Your loving daughter,
Josefinita

P.S. Please find Tia a dress for her funeral.

4 Jul 2010

4th of July Humor

Some 4th of July humor to keep your BBQ going.

What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?
Beneduck Arnold!

What did Paul Revere say at the end of his ride?
"I gotta get a softer saddle!"

What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?
The Boston Flea Party!

What did one flag say to the other flag?
Nothing. It just waved!

What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!

Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!

Why did the British cross the Atlantic?
To get to the other tide!

What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?
Yankee Poodle!

Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up!

Check out the original post for more jokes at strangerockstars.com

28 Jun 2010

Pretty Kewl Turn Signal Biking Jacket (VIDEO)

Checkout this video to see the latest jacket invention to keep cyclist free of danger.

29 May 2010

Mom's orchid in her glory

I can always count on this orchid to bloom when ever there is some thing happening in my life. That's a sign from mom :0)

27 May 2010

Breakfast at Ginger's - Cute Video

Cute golden retriever having breakfast.

Do you have any cute pet videos you want to share? Post the links in the comment section for us to see.

15 May 2010

Stupid things to do with your cell phone

If you're ever bored, here are 3 stupid things you can do with your cell phone to entertain yourself. Some how though I feel the need to say "don't try this at home" on #2 and #3.

Cellular & Mobile Phones:
Stupid Things To Try With Your Phone

What other things would you add to this list?

7 May 2010

The Pastor's ass

The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.

The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again.

The local paper read:

PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day the local paper headline read:

BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the Bishop so he ordered the Pastor to get rid of the donkey.

The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The Bishop fainted.

He informed the Nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the paper read:

NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the Bishop so he ordered the Nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read:

NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The Bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is . . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery . . even shorten your life.

So be yourself and enjoy life.

Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!